InTheDappledRain on DeviantArthttps://www.deviantart.com/inthedappledrain/art/EBC-I-ve-Been-A-Terrible-Mother-363796687InTheDappledRain

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EBC: I've Been A Terrible Mother

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"If anybody had ever told me that one day I would be facing the hunters as a free serval, I would have probably turned around and laughed in their faces. Not because I didn't believe in freedom, but because of the ties I had to the hunter world. Once you become a mate to one, escape isn't exactly an easy option, especially if you're a great coliseum fighter and you've produced a healthy litter once before. So of course, when I found myself, pregnant, on empire territory, you can be rest assured that I had to let myself exhale a long sigh of pleasure before I even considered worrying about the effect on the journey upon my unborn litter. Though the need to protect the unborn cubs -- which I later learned would be only one single cub -- was still strong, I was more than proud to be accepted into the ranks of the Lightning Empire.

Unfortunately, I was called away from my daughter before I could really bond with her... and to be quite frank, I didn't even really think about her much while I was going out on extra hunting duties and patrols. I was more than happy to know that I was somewhere that my daughter and I both could rest easy knowing that we had other felines to protect us if anything bad happened...

I was foolish to think that. Me, of all cats, should have known better than to walk around the territory acting as if nothing bad could ever happen. I knew the hunters at one point in time because my own mate was a hunter. He told me grand stories of attacking cats and dragging their tails home while gaining praise and glory from this master. I was envious for a time, since I was constantly battling my way through the coliseums, but I dealt with it. I mean, what else could I do? Of course, none of his stories came to mind until the night I awakened to the yowls of cats fighting.

We had been attacked, taken by surprise in the dead of night while everything seemed as if it would be perfectly fine. My first thought was to instantly protect my daughter, who I almost at once realized wasn't in the nursery... but instead with the healer of our empire, Suggarra.

There is a part of me that knows I owe a terrible debt to the cougar, but the more I look at her and how my daughter became attached to her instead of me, it reminds me of just how careless I was. I should have been more protective, and although I blamed Abiola for my lack of... attention... I know it was more my fault than his. I never spoke up and told Viatrix that I had my daughter to worry about. I never even considered going back to the nursery when I was allowed to work as a full gladiator. My own daughter would ask where I was going and how long it'd take before I came back and I didn't even think that I didn't have to leave. I just thought I had to go and do my stuff as any other cat did for their empire.

Watching those helpless cubs get killed before my very eyes, listening to the screams of pain and suffering escape the maws of a dozen or more cats. So many cats are lost.

Our force is broken. Our strength cut in half.

I realized that night that I've been a terrible mother... I haven't given Theron the time of day she deserves, and now that she's old enough to be an apprentice, all I can think about is her. I worry... will I be overprotective? Is it okay to try and assert myself back into her life?

Or have I already screwed up?

I'm a failure... I couldn't even protect the cubs I tried to save.

Theron... forgive me."




Eyes two of five done :dummy: I had a lot of fun trying to figure out Bellona's concept and stuff since she really didn't get attacked by a lot of characters (and if she did, I don't think any of them were really in the face) I figured this would be a good reason behind Bellona's realization and sudden protectiveness over her empire, and why she's going to start trying to interact more with Theron. I hope you like it
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The-Skykian-Archives's avatar
Aw Bell D: Dun be saaaaaad

Her eyes are so beautiful <3